Thorny Advice

“You didn’t!” laughed Dirk.

“Yes, I did,” said Miller. “Why not?”

“It’s… it’s so 1970’s. So kitch.”

“Not really. You wouldn’t believe how many people write in on the website. “So, I decided that I’d ask a few people I knew to sort of step in and answer questions.”

“Okay, I can sorta see it, but don’t people get these kinds of questions answered on Fetlife or or some of those other websites online?” Dirk was still unable to wrap his head around Miller’s new twist to the Rosy Thorn.

“Well, some do and some don’t. There are people who want answers and either don’t trust the invisible person on the other end of the internet, or can’t wait for three days while the webmaster answers. So, I set up a few phone lines. With the PBX system, it was easy. I just have things routed through our VoIP phones. Sally, Kerri, Belinda and Tim are fielding calls. What’s really funny is that Sally and Kerri switch to whichever side of the equation needed. They are doing really well.”

Dirk just shook his head. Sally and Kerri worked together, so that actually made sense. Belinda worked as research librarian at the nearby university, and Tim ran a rental car agency. Phone calls wouldn’t interrupt any of the jobs too much.

“Oh, and before you get too wrapped up in work, when you are on duty, your phone may become part of the chat network if we have an issue.” Miller smiled at Dirk.

“I… I am not a phone call Dom!”

“You are when you work for me.” Miller laughed as he walked off.

“Thorn line, prickly questions are our specialty, how can I help you?” Sally rattled off when the second line on her phone rang. She listened for a few minutes as the person talked. “No, that is perfectly normal. Just understand that individuals bruise in different ways. Skin tone is not always a factor either. It has more to do with how close to the surface blood vessels are than anything else.”

She waited as the person asked a second question. “No, as long as you don’t mind, anything is possible. Using kitchen utensils to spank with is very normal. We like to call them pervertibles. Yes, if it can be perverted into use in a D/s relationship, it’s called a pervertible. It’s convertible from flipping pancakes to smacking your ass.” Sally rolled her eyes at Kerri who was handling another call. “Thank you and call again.”

Kerri finished up a moment later. “You know, I thought Miller was crazy when he suggested this.”

“So did I. However, it’s working. He’s even gotten the billing done. We took in $600.00 in just the first week.”

“That’s pretty good.”

“Agreed. However, we need to make sure to turn off the connection when we go home.”

“Oh shit! Were you in bed?” Kerri looked at Sally in horror.

“You could say I was tied up. James answered and I swore I could hear the person ‘yip’. It was funny and sad all at the same time.”

“Was James understanding?”

“Yes, once he got done laughing. It was some ‘baby dom’ trying to tell his sub that it was okay to do something kinky,” laughed Sally.

“Oh geeze. Whipped cream? Baby oil?”

“Lube and a dildo I think. It might have been a carrot.”

“You think it was a carrot?”

“Yeah. Well, I had a little trouble hearing, plus the gag kept me from saying much. James convinced the baby dom to get his sub to choose her own personal diakon radish instead of a carrot, because then her pussy wouldn’t turn orange.”

“Oh damn! A diakon radish? Those things are huge!”

“Not to mention that it’s a radish!

“Oh that poor sub!” Kelly wiped tears of laughter off of her face.

“I don’t know. I have the feeling that she took one look at that and punched that baby dom right between the eyes.”

Kerri laughed. “Shall we go home? I don’t know about you, but it’s date night at our house.”

“Ah. How are things going for David since his um…” Sally trailed off.

“He’s doing very good. He and his father speak at least once a week. I think it does them both good to talk.” .

“Oh damn. Those must be some very interesting conversations.”

“You’d be surprised. It’s a lot of what I think of as boring normal stuff. ‘How are you? What’s the weather like? Did that crop work as expected? How’s Pet,’ and that sort of thing.”


“She’s one of the subs that helps run the Oak and Thorn club that LD owns. She really captured his attention. Apparently even took the old man to bed.” Kerri smiled.

“You know, I have a hard time thinking of Lord Duncan as an old man.”

“Yeah, but there are days he is so funny, that I can’t see him as anything other than a dirty old man,” laughed Kerri as they walked out the door.

6 thoughts on “Thorny Advice

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    1. This one actually came from a phone call with a friend. Not anything actually said in the call, but the conversation made my brain skitter off into the unknown and poof! Oh, and Wolf is responsible for the diakon radish.

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