Flash Fiction Friday Wanker!


“He said what?”

“Max asked me if I wanted to hold his pocket rocket while we were at the bonfire watching the fireworks.”

Marion rolled her eyes. “Just how juvenile can they get?”

“Pretty bad really. After I ignored that daft remark, he asked if I wanted to meet his throbbing member of Parliament!”

Claire just shook with laughter. “Do they think that really turns us on?”

“I think so. Apparently there’s a whole song about things to call it. Pet Names for Genitalia by Tom Green.*

“And I thought it was bad reading D.H. Laurence’s book where the gardener talks about his cock by calling it John Thomas.” Claire stretched out on the bed and looked at Marion as they talked.

“Have you ever noticed there isn’t a similar list for women?”

“Yes, and some of them are just nasty.”

Marion nodded in agreement, and then rolled towards Claire. The two of them began to touch and explore one another’s naked body. Deep tongue heavy kisses changed to nips and licks. As Claire straddled Marion, she lowered her mouth to kiss the sweet smelling pussy. Claire ground her tongue against Marion’s clit.

Marion moaned and repaid the favor by licking and fingering Claire until she cried out as she came. The two of them entwined arms and legs in a ball of mutual pleasure. One of them grabbed the vibrator from the nightstand and soon the buzzing of the toy mingled with cries of delight. The vibrator hummed quietly between Marion’s thighs. “Who needs a guy with all those cheesy lines when you have a B.O.B.**?”


Well, done before noon on Friday! Whee! This one was a bit of a giggle. All I could think of was the Tom Green song. 🙂 Our challenge for the day was:

Key Words: Throbbing member, rocket

Forbidden Words: Love truncheon, gloryhole

Word Limit: 269 words

Bonus Words: An extra 69 if you can write it without giggling.

Extra Credit: What’s the cheesiest line anyone’s ever used on you, in all seriousness, in the bedroom?

I probably could have taken the bonus words, but decided not to. As for the cheesiest line ever? Ummm… “That’s why they call it a blow job.” said the man who blew on my pussy instead of licking it!

**Battery Operated Boyfriend.

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